An Engaged/24 year old/Catholic's Response to 23 Things

Many of you have probably noticed the article floating around on Facebook called, “23 things to do instead of getting engaged before you’re 23.” If you haven’t, here it is:

http://wanderonwards.com/2013/12/30/23-things-to-do-instead-of-getting-engaged-before-youre-23/ 

You may have also seen a rebuttal by a married women of 25, if not,

http://kbeauregard.wordpress.com/2013/12/31/my-first-blog-the-result-of-a-close-minded-23-year-old/.  The first article disturbed me in many ways, but the second one did too! The second blog had good points, but as she entered into her list, I disagreed just as I had with the first one. You won’t fully get what I’m saying if you have not at least read the first blog.

First off, I am not married...yet. I am 24 years old and engaged to the most perfect man to complete me and lead me to Heaven. As a Catholic, I firmly stand behind Vocations. For me, there are two options in my life: 1. Become a Sister or a Nun 2. Get Married. To find your Vocation is the most important thing in your life!!! Why?! Because through your Vocation, you come closer to God. The closer you get to God, the more you become like Him. Do I want to be like God? Yes, very much so. Do I fail? Everyday. Will I fail when I am married? Yes, absolutely. Would I fail as a Nun? Yes. I am human, but I desire greatness. I can achieve greatness only through my Vocation. 

What am I getting at? Well, being single is wonderful. I took my time. I discovered myself and who I wanted to be. I explored, became a missionary, and loved on myself for awhile. I was incredibly happy. Life was beautiful and a great adventure! In college, I discerned religious life. I visited Convents and my Aunt is a Nun, so I grew up visiting. Through that exploration, two Nuns (who didn’t know each other) told me I wasn’t a good fit. Ha. So I decided to start praying for my future husband. If you know me, I’m stubborn, a perfectionist, and always busy (not good qualities, I know). I prayed to God to bless the poor guy that ended up with me. I wasn’t looking, but everyday I’d offer up a short prayer. Well, God gave me James. He’s equally as stubborn and a perfectionist, but in the most perfect way for me. He challenges me, brings me closer to God, and makes me happier than ever because I have someone to SHARE EVERYTHING WITH. I’m sure this will grow even more when we become married. 

Here is my list of 23 things to do married and some unmarried, to make you closer to God and a better person (it mirrors the 2nd blog):

1. I choose not to have safe sex because I’m not having sex. I’m waiting until I’m married and can completely give myself over to my spouse. That’s a beautiful concept.
2. I do have a passport and I would love to go to the Vatican with my future husband.
3. I get cold easily, so I probably won’t be running around my house naked, but I’m sure my future husband wouldn’t mind.
4. James has a tattoo. It’s the Chi Rho symbol, which means Christ. It’s great for Evangelization because no one knows what it is. I don’t want a tattoo. 
5. Go visit different Convents with your best friend. Help discern your Vocation...together. Shout out to Sister Gabriella!
6. Go to Mass together.
7. Start a family....DON’T wait (if you’re married). Marriage is to procreate. If you’re able and not creating, you’re limiting God’s plan. 
8. Kiss your husband and tell him that you love him.
9. I can’t see James really liking Pinterest projects, but go thrifting together and get creative without Pinterest. 
10. Consecrate yourselves to Jesus through Mary together. “Things are more fun with your best friend.”
11. James would never do CrossFit, but we do like to workout together. Let’s be real, working out is one of James’ favorite things.
12. Being glutenous is not on my list of things to do. Eating a whole pint of ice cream will just make me sick. I’ll just make James a protein shake.
13. I like the build a future, but with God at the center.
14. I will try not to disappoint my husband, but yes, I’m sure it will happen; however, make-up sex is not my answer. Instead, I’d like to pray with my husband and thank God for the opportunity to grow and to help make me stronger through it.
15. Cook or bake TOGETHER. You’re married, you’re a team...duh.
16. I like starting traditions together. Especially ones like visiting the Vatican every couple of years, Baptizing our children, going to Mass several times a week as a family, and other holy things like that.
17. Travel the United States and visit our missionary friends, visit shrines, go to Mass in different Catholic Churches, and pray hiking Rosaries.
18. I like having a sleepover with my husband every night...duh. I’m not married yet, but I’m sure it will be great....especially when there’s kiddos around too.
19. Have fun and share in that fun with others.
20. Adopt a child (if you're married). 
21. James and I have started a small business called JMJ Nutrition. It’s a diet, supplement, and protein company. If you don’t know, JMJ stands for Jesus, Mary, and Joseph. Pretty cool and holy huh?!
22. I’ve had a blog for awhile and James loves to read it and gives me advice, but my blogs typically focus on my mission work.
23. I am in total favor of befriending other married couples, in fact, James and I are talking about leading a married couples Bible study around August. We’ll be married in May.

There is no “right” age to find your Vocation. It’s whenever God shows it to you, you’re willing to take time for it, and when you’re willing to accept it and follow Him. Many of our great Saints are young and they experienced the most amazing lives! Some have been dead for hundreds of years and we are still reading about their lives because of how exciting they are! When you are in union with God through your Vocation, your whole life changes. 

Bottom line is it doesn’t matter if you’re married before age 23 or after. What matters is if God is at the center of you life and you will do anything in the world to come to know Him more fully. I am blessed to have found my Vocation. I cannot wait to marry James and to be a strong Catholic couple together. “Go, therefore, make disciples of all nations; baptize them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, and teach them to observe all the commands I gave you. And look, I am with you always; yes, to the end of time.” Matthew 28:19-20

In Jesus, Anna